What I'm Reading Right Now

Lately I've been too busy reading what I have to read to read anything for my own edification or pleasure. But due to a difficult family situation, I was inclined to pick up a book that had been in my "get to it someday" stack for some time. And what a blessing it has been!

Back in my days as an assistant at Word Publishing (now W Publishing Group), I had the pleasure of working with Dr. Chuck Lynch. (He was a dream author to work with, by the way. Extremely accommodating and humble.) He is a psychologist and president of Living Foundation Ministries. His book, You Can Work It Out, is about restoring relationships by tapping into the power of personal responsibility.

Now this may all sound like psycho-mumbo-jumbo, but his idea is really very simplistic: Everyone involved in a conflict has his or her own circle of responsibility. One person's circle may cover 75% of the conflict, while another's may cover 50%. Still another could cover just 5%. The point is, a conflict is never just one person's fault.

Lynch's method is to establish where the parties are AT and determine where they want to BE, before establishing responsibility. Then the parties take an X-ray of their conflict, identifying their circle of responsibility. (Lynch offers step-by-step examples of how to do this.) Only when responsibility is established can the parties move toward where they want to BE.

Dr. Lynch primarily addresses marital issues, but his principles can be applied to other relationships. He offers biblical insight to back up his methods. He also tackles situations involving others who won't accept their responsibility. (Guess what? You're still responsible for yours!)

God is teaching me how to deal with someone I just don't know how to handle. He's prompting me to pray more and get angry less. God has also assured me that vengeance is his (Yes, even God has a circle of responsibility!) and hidden sins are made known. For my part, I have to dismiss bitterness and not allow anger to cause me to sin.