Two Roads Diverged...

Remember that poem by Robert Frost, The Road Not Taken? "Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both and be one traveler, long I stood and looked down one as far as I could to where it bent in the undergrowth..." Okay, so that was from memory, so don't sue me if I don't have all the puctuation correct. The point of the poem is that the traveler takes the road that looks the least worn--the uncommon path--and it makes an amazing difference in his life.

I've been thinking a lot lately about the paths we each take. I recently discovered some bizarre twists that took place in the lives of some of my college acquaintences. These discoveries were the result of some random web searches. Some of these people have become quite successful, but it's a strange, twisted success that I can't really go into. (I went to a conservative Christian college, remember? They are NOT living conservative lives!) Others have achieved only moderate success, and in the process have abandoned who they once were--one of them very literally: he changed his name!

I wonder what old acquaintences would think of me today? Would they think it's kinda cool that I'm a writer and that my words are now in print for all to see? Or would they find it disappointing that someone with a degree in vocal performance who lives in Music City isn't doing anything more with that opportunity than singing with the praise team on Sunday mornings? (Note: I'm not dissing the praise team. Singing for the "audience of One" is more important than any other performance.)

I struggle with my mission...my vision...my life's calling. I love being a mother more than anything, and I see that as my first priority, but I wonder if I'm doing enough with my life. I seem to always take the "safe" road--the one that offers financial security and a dental plan. I have so many interests that sometimes it's hard for me to define my passions. I tend to be a dabbler--do one thing for a while and then move on to the next. (Of course with the two girls, I don't seem to have the time or energy to do much dabbling.)

I've never worried about having a job. I know there are dozens of things I can do, and even do well. But what do I want to do? What was I meant to do? It still eludes me, and I stay on the safe path.

But I haven't given up the search. Someday I'll find the uncommon path that has my name on it. Just wait.